Sad Confession :(

Ok - I am a bad girl. All year, I worked so hard to train for my races and to lose the weight I gained during and after my pregnancy. When I left for San Francisco, I was down 40lbs from where I started on January 1. And then I slacked off. I blame part of it on my dark days after finishing my Team in Training journey. Another I indirectly blame my twinners for deciding that sleeping through the night is an optional activity after they had done so well up til then (teething be damned...mamma needs her sleep!)

Of course, I suppose I could have just sucked it up and foregone the extra few hours of sleep to get on the bike or to haul my ass out the door for a weekday run...though honestly, I kept telling myself it was ok to sleep longer because I was technically still recovering. Can you hear all of my excuses piling up yet? Perhaps you can hear the crinkling of discarded candy wrappers in my garbage can because I NEEDED the tub of peppermint patties the size of my head for while I was working on writing my book!

Well, today I stepped on the scale and hauled out the measuring tape. I'd been weighing in and watching my weight creep up, but the measuring hadn't been done since the week before we left for California. Today, I let the reality slap me across the face a few times as I saw the scale tell me I was 7lbs heavier than a month ago. The tape was the worst, though. 5 inches. Youch. That stung.

So, what am I going to do about it? Well, what can I do but buckle down again. My food journal is the thing that kept me on track before so now I will once again write everything down and try to stick within the rough calorie allowance I give myself. I'll head to bed earlier so that an interrupted night won't leave me as sleep deprived because I definitely need those early morning workouts. I went from a manageable 20 lbs to lose before Mexico in April to a daunting 27lbs.

My first goal is to drop the 7 I just gained before Christmas. 7lbs in a month = do-able. And with my announcement to my hubby this morning that I m not baking this December - I think it might actually happen. Then I will work my butt off (and my belly and those jiggly thighs) to lose the last 20 before I get on that plane. I think I need to register for that half marathon I've been faltering on so I have a training schedule to follow again.

As for today..I am giving myself one last bad girl day. A place to wallow in chips and chocolate covered pretzels while I write. Tomorrow I am going to haul out my old Richard Simmons Foodmover and concentrate on staying within my calorie allowance while attempting to stick to the Canada Food Guide so I know I'm being healthy. Tomorrow I become good diet momma again and strive towards making something of myself that my daughters won't one day be embarrassed to walk through the mall with (Well, until they are teenagers anyway - nothing will save me then LOL)